dit is halt Berlin

Humans are social creatures. We live in a system. A system with rules and everything. Most of these rules have been implemented long ago and maybe do not resemble the zeitgeist anymore. Some of these rules might even be hard to follow, but following the rules has a purpose.

There’s systems that work better than others when taking things like human rights and the right to have a say into account, but if we did not follow the rules, we would live in anarchy.

No system = no safety; no safety = the strong rule and the weak are being suppressed.

Ok, this might sound a bit extreme. Especially because I’m about to tell you why I’m writing this garbanzo.

So, as you might know, Berlin is pretty fame for its kebabs. It’s probably the streetfood nr. 1. A couple of days ago I was sitting in the regionalbahn. They have these little tables there where you can place your laptop, cup of coffee or whatever. Some people also think that it’s convenient to take their lunch on the train with them. If it was quiet food and food that doesn’t have an intense smell, then sure. But when I sat there, these two women come in, sit down at one of them tables and both unload a big ass kebab.

“What the fuck” I think to myself. The smell is already intense, and as they start unwrapping it, they (no kidding) start talking about how strong the smell of it is.

Well great job! You’ve realized it. Wouldn’t the next step be to consider whether the other passengers on the train want to be exposed to the smell of your kebabs?

They apparently didn’t ask themselves that question. “Enjoy your meal!” one said to the other, and they sank their teeth into their chopped animal – salad – garlic sauce – monster – meal.

Maybe I have a sensitive nose (and that I can’t say no to a conflict I’ve known for a long time), but I was sooo tempted to go up to them and just say something like “what the hell is wrong with you people?” I didn’t though (because I had to get off the train soon anyhow).

What annoyed me as well was the fact that nobody seemed to give a fuck. What if everyone would just take their smelly af kebab on the train? Litter on the street? Steal groceries from the supermarket?

There’s certain rules that we live by. Some are actual laws, and others are norms that also form the society that we live in. Norms that every person should respect. Norms that give us an identity. If everyone just does what pleases them, and nobody gives a damn, then that’s anarchy.

Berlin is not a place where anarchy reins, nor should it.

There’s a sentence that I truly detest, and I hear it waay too often.

“Dit is halt Berlin!” (“Well that’s Berlin!”)

You would never hear someone from Berlin say that sentence (unless he's/she's not quite right in the head). At least not with the same connotation as other people, who are not from Berlin.

Here are a couple of situations where people would use it (incorrectly).

Situation nr. 1: You get onto the train, look for a place to sit, find a seat, are about to sit down, give it one last look, and realize, that someone has taken a shit there.

Reaction: “Dit is halt Berlin!”

Situation nr. 2: It’s in the middle of the night on a Tuesday, you are sleeping peacefully, cuddling with your partner, cat or pillow, and then suddenly at 4AM, the doorbell rings and you are wide awake and can’t sleep for the rest of the night.

Reaction: “Dit is halt Berlin!”

Situation nr. 3: You are riding your bike to work. You are on the bike path next to the street. It has been raining. You enjoy the (more or less) fresh air and the breeze and then BOOOM! A car at full speed comes blasting past you right in the moment where you were passing a big dirty puddle on the street. You are soaked now and there’s still 7km to go until you are at work where you have no changing clothes. You can’t go back home because you have an important meeting to attend in less than an hour.

Reaction: “Dit is halt Berlin!”

I could keep on going but I think I have made myself clear. That ain’t Berlin! That’s just you being a bit fucked in the head. Can’t you say something nice about Berlin?

Example nr. 1: Oh, it’s such a lovely day. The sun is out, the birds are singing, and everything is so nice and green. Berlin has so many parks and I will go to one of them now, lay down in the sun and read a book.

“Dit is halt Berlin!”

Example nr. 2: You get onto the train, look for a place to sit, find a seat, are about to sit down, give it one last look, and realize that someone has taken a shit there. You think to yourself “omg! Someone is really not coping well with the system we are living in. I will try to help the less fortunate ones and sign up as a volunteer in a homeless shelter tomorrow. People should be there for one another.”

“Dit is halt Berlin!”

Example nr. 3: It’s a Thursday evening and you had a stressful day, your fridge at home is empty and you crave to drink 1 or 2 beers. In your hometown the stores would already be closed by now. But you (thank God) are in Berlin. The supermarkets are still open and even if they were closed, the next späti is right around the corner.

Jonah (24) from Düsseldorf: “Dit is halt Berlin!”

What a lad!

I can’t imagine someone going to Hamburg, walking along the Reeperbahn, seeing all the filth, coming to the conclusion that Hamburg is rotten, and saying “dit is halt Hamburg!”

Or someone going to Dresden on a Monday, running into a Pegida (Patriotische Europäer gegen die Islamisierung des Abendlandes – Patriotic Europeans against the Islamization of the West) – demonstration, and saying “dit is halt Dresden!”

People would be offended and why do people from outside even consider being in a position where they can judge a city and form its character by saying things like that. Shouldn’t it be the other way around? Shouldn’t the people who grew up in a place be the ones to tell others how it’s like?

I hope my train of thought is visible still. What I’m trying to say is, that when being in a situation like the ones described above, people shouldn’t have the association that this is what Berlin is like, because It’s not. If shit on the seat in the subway is what you consider to be Berlin – like, then sitting down in that pile of shit is what you deserve. I mean if that’s what you expect Berlin to be like and if you ain’t into that kinda shit, why are you even in Berlin in the first place?

Berlin is not some anarchistic place where everyone does whatever pleases them, and nobody gives a fuck. If that's how your Berlin is like and if that is the way you are living in Berlin then I feel sorry for you and all of the others that have to deal with you.

Hope you enjoyed todays content (although it sounds a bit like a rant it’s supposed to be humorous) and as always, much love.